A few days ago I had one of those days. A day when nothing was going according to plan, patience was no where to be found, nor was obedience on my son’s part.
I was struggling.
It was hard to just be; let alone be mommy, cook, maid, entertainer, teacher and friend.
Truth…lately I’ve been struggling with some crazy stuff in my life. God has been taking me through a refinement period and it has been intense and exhausting at times. Days seem to go by in a blur and so many times I feel almost outside of myself, as if I am merely watching what is going on, but not participating in my own life.
It is hard to be a woman when you feel empty. It is hard to be a mom when you feel inadequate. It is hard to be a friend when you feel replacable. It is hard to be a wife when you feel unappreciated and undesirable.
The absolute truth – My God is the only one who can fill me to overflowing. God completes me and He is enough. God has placed me, positioned me and purposed me for such a time as this. God desires me.
And on this particular day, when such lies were beating at me and when I could barely raise my head, I got out of my house, put my son in his car seat and turned the ignition. And as soon as the car turned on, my Life Song came on.
It’s like my soul is flying when my feet are on the ground.
So take this heart of mine there’s no doubt,
I’m in better hands now.
I am strong all because of you.
I stand in awe of every mountain that you move.
I am changed, yesterday is gone.
I am safe from this moment on.
There’s no fear when the night comes round,
I’m in better hands now.
But do you know what the most amazing moment was after that? As soon as that song ended, the DJ came on and was talking about something or other and my son asked me to put on his favorite song, “Mighty to Save.” I was about to tell him that I did not have a remote and could not play the song ( thanks to our DVR, my son thinks that everything can be seen/heard at a push of the button on the remote) and before I could even get the words out, “Mighty to Save” came on the radio and my son says, “Tank tcho, mommy.”
I was overwhelmed. Awestruck.
Tears welled up in my eyes and I said, “Mommy didn’t do that baby, say thank you to Jesus.” And he replied, “Tank tcho, Jejus.”
God was telling me, “I love you. I will lift you up. And you know what…I love your son too.”
“I stand in awe of every mountain that you move. I am changed, yesterday is gone.” – Better Hands Now, Natalie Grant