I just left my son to be put to bed by his father.

It was a rather precious sight and I wish with every ounce of me that I could capture that moment on film.

Just snap away and keep it with me.

Crazy kid is a big boy for his age I guess. One pound for all 37 inches of him. Most days I think, “My goodness child you are so big,” especially when I haven’t gotten any smaller and when trying to carry said 37 lbs. up the stairs because he fell asleep in the car is quite a challenge.

But today, I looked at him and thought, “He is still so small.” His head reaches the door knob.

I watched my husband sit down on the rocker and my son jump into his lap, he looked so small and precious. Of course not anything like those first few months of tinyness, but still small.

He curled up in his father’s lap and rested his head on his chest.

Oh my.

He is so independant and very strong willed and sometimes, no, many times, throughout the day I have a hard time parenting. Many times I feel very unsuccessful at this whole mothering thing.

Sometimes I think life would be easier if he were one of those easy going kind of kids. He isn’t. He has an opinion and he will not let up.

And then I think, I am gald he is so strong willed. It is a great trait and if we do a good job, maybe he will turn that into great confidence and a strong mind of his own that won’t follow the crowd or be swayed in wrong directions.

And tonight as I looked at my two boys holding each other I thought, this kid is the best kid in the world. How long will he fit into his father’s arms? Worse, how long will he want to fit into his father’s arms? How long will he want mine?

He is so sweet and charming and funny. And he loves us. He loves me. And man, do I love him. I could never ask for anything better. And even though he may test me, his personality is making me into a better person. He teaches me more than I could teach him.

I could never ask for anything more.

“Father, thank you for my son. He is such a precious gift. Thank you for his personality, his spirit, his fun loving nature and his charm. Father I know I am not the best mom, no matter how much I try or even sometimes pretend to be, but I just figured out that even if I am not, he thinks I am. He teaches me things all day long and I thank you for that. Protect my baby, keep him small a little while longer and mostly, let me remember and treasure these moments forever. And let him grow into the man you desire him to be. In your precious name, Amen. “

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